Going through a divorce as a grown adult is one thing, and it’s another when you’re a growing child. Devastation and confusion is magnified in children’s hearts and minds since they are too immature to understand why their parents are breaking their marriage covenant. Especially when they are trying to develop their concept of what love looks like in relationships.
So, how can you put your children first while going through a divorce? The first step is understanding the fact that they are going to question you and show the emotions that adults often suppress. Let them express their hurt, anger, bitterness, and resentment. Unfortunately, it is part of the cost you are paying for your separation and new beginning as a single parent.
Time and patience
As much as possible, give your children your time and patience during your divorce. In many ways, it is their divorce as well. They are having to adjust to all the changes and suffer emotional grievance along with the parents. Give your children the assurance that you are still available to them during this time.
The stability of your love and assurance is priceless.
Connection is everything
Make sure your kids know they are always connected with you and that divorce does not disconnect them from your love. Despite how you may live in another home and have less custody, be present and available to them as much as possible. Never underestimate the influence and power you have as their parent.
Divorce is devastating for most parents, but especially on the kids. Always reassure them of your love and make time to connect and offer stability through a quality relationship. Don’t waste the time you have to invest in them, despite what the divorce dictates. You can never get time back, and once your children are grown they may repeat your mistakes. Start enforcing positive changes now.
